Archive-name: Humour/sorority.txt Archive-author: Archive-title: Canonical List of Sorority Girl Jokes 1. Q: What do you say to a sorority girl that won't give in? A: "Have another beer." 2. Q: Why does a sorority girl wear underwear? A: To keep her ankles warm. 3. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a Rolls Royce? A: Not everybody has been in a Rolls Royce. 4. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a toilet? A: A toilet doesn't follow you around after you use it. 5. Q: What does a sorority girl put behind her ears to make her look more attractive? A: Her ankles. 6. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball? A1: You can only put three fingers in a bowling ball. A2: You could eat a bowling ball if you had to. A3: You can't fit a sorority girl inside a bowling ball. A4: There is no difference. They're both round and have three holes to poke. 7. Q: How are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike? A: You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they'll always come back. 8. Q: What is the difference between a sorority girls and hookers? A: Sorority girls cost less per score. 9. Q: What is the difference between a sorority girl and an elephant? A: About 40 pounds. Q2: How do you equalize the two? A2: Feed the elephant. 10. Q: What is the first thing a sorority girl does in the morning? A1: Introduces herself. A2: Walks home. 11. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and the Titanic? A: Only 1500 went down on the Titanic. 12. Q: How can you tell if a sorority girl has achieved orgasm? A: She drops her nail file. 13. Q: What's a sorority girls favorite wine? A: "Daaaaaaady, I want to go to Mi-ammmmmmi." 14. Q: What do you get when you cross a sorority girl with an ape? A: Don't know. There's only so much an ape can be forced to do. 15. Q: Why is a sorority girl like a door knob? A: 'Cause everybody gets a turn. 16. Q: How do you get a sorority girl in your bed? A: Grease her hips so she'll fit through the door, and throw a twinkie on the bed. 17. Q: Did you hear about the new sorority girl doll? A: You put a ring on her finger and her hips expand. 18. Q: What's the difference between sorority girls and garbage? A: Garbage gets taken out once a week. 19. Q: What do you call a 100 sorority girls bathing on a beach in Cuba? A: Bay of Pigs. 20. Q: What do you call a sorority girl hang-gliding festival? A: Multiple total eclipses. 21. Q: What is a sorority girls mating call? A: "I'm sooooooo drunk, I'm sooooooo drunk." 22. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a dog? A: Driver's will swerve to miss the dog. 23. Q: How many sorority girls does it take to change a light bulb? A1: 1, she holds on to it, and the world revolves around her. A2: 2, one to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call Daddy. A3: 6, one to screw it in, and five to make T-shirts. A4: 7, one to change it, and six to go out and buy more Diet Pepsi. A5: 65, one to change it, and 64 to sing and clap. 24. Q: Why is a sorority girl like railroad tracks? A: 'Cause she's been laid all over the country. 25. Q: What three words will a sorority girl never hear? A: "Attention K-mart shoppers." 26. Q: Why does a sorority girl close her eyes during sex? A: So she can fantasize about shopping. 27. Q: What is a sorority girls favorite position? A: Facing Bloomingdale's. 28. Q: What's the difference between sorority girls and Jell-o? A: Jell-o wiggles when you eat it. 29. Q: What do you call a sorority girl's waterbed? A1: Lake Placid. A2: The Dead Sea. 30. Q: How do you know when a sorority girl is a nymphomaniac? A: She'll make love the same day she had her hair done. 31. Q: What's a sorority girl's idea of natural childbirth? A: No make-up. 32. Q: How do you prevent a sorority girl from having sex? A: Marry her. 33. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a broom closet? A: Only two men fit inside a broom closet at once. 34. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a phone booth? A1: You need a quarter to use the phone. A2: Only one person can use the phone at once. 35. Q: What's the difference between a sorority and a circus? A: A circus is a cunning array of stunts. 36. Q: How is a sorority girl like a vacuum? A: They both suck. Q2: How are they different? A1: You can buy a new vacuum when you get sick of it. A2: You can buy a new vacuum when it no longer sucks. A3: When a vacuum cleaner is full of shit, it's easy to dump the old bag. A4: A vacuum cleaner can't suck a golf ball through a garden hose. A5: A vacuum cleaner can't suck start a Harley. 37. Q: How do you get four sorority girls on one chair? A1: Tell them there is a rich guy sitting in it. A2: Turn the chair over, and put one on each leg. 38. Q: What's the difference between a sorority track team and a tribe of sly pygmies? A: The tribe of sly pygmies are a bunch of cunning runts. 39. Q: What does the Bermuda Triangle and sorority girls have in common? A: They've both swallowed a lot of semen. 40. Q: What does a sorority girl make for dinner? A: Reservations. 41. Q: Why does a sorority girl wear a gold diaphragm? A: So her boyfriend will think he's coming into money. 42. Q: What did the sorority girl say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? A: "It's OK Daddy, I'm not hurt." 43. Q: What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a sorority girl? A: A prostitute says, "Are you done yet?", a nymphomaniac says, "You're done already?", and a sorority girl says, "Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige." 44. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a rooster? A: In the morning a rooster says, "Cock'll-doodl-doooo", while a sorority girl says, "Any-cock'll-doooo." 45. Q: What do you call 24 sorority girls walking down the street? A: A case of Schlitz. 46. Q: What is foreplay for a sorority girl? A: Thirty minutes of begging. 47. Q: How does a sorority girl commit suicide? A: She gathers her clothes into a pile and jumps off. Misc: 1. Tri-delts. I'm sure everyone else has. 2. If your date won't; Tri-delts. 3. Once you've tried everything else; Tri-delts. __________ __________ \ //\\ / \ // \\ / \ // \\ / \ // \\ / \//________\\/ Tri-delts: Two out of three go down. --