Love Letter to a Friend

I don't know if I'll ever give this to you. This has been circling
around inside my head for quite sometime now. It seems to always be in
the back of my mind, you always seem to be in the back of my mind.

I'm wondering how often you think of me; if I just pop into your
thoughts the way you do with mine, if you fantasize about me, about
us. Despite what I've said part of me is curious about what it would
feel like to be in your arms; to taste your kiss, to feel you hands on
me.

What if something were to happen? What if after I realized how much I
loved my other half…would you be able to be just friends after a kiss,
a touch. Would these be warm and soothing like the sound of your
voice? Or would it be like chain lightning threading its way between
our bodies.

I like the way I feel when I'm with you. It's been so long since any
one has said the things that you have said to me. You make me feel
important, sexy, wanted. I know that I'm loved, but I don't feel
beloved by my other half. Does that make sense?

I don't know you. Not totally. But in the short time that I have known
you I've come to care about you very much. I love the sound of your
voice, so soothing. Your sense of humour keeps me on my toes too. You
don't judge me for the decisions I've had to make in my life. I like
that you are open with me; you instill trust and I know I can tell you
just about anything. In your words, we just click.

You once asked me if I ever had any regrets. Well I do now. I regret
that I can't give you what you deserve, that if I were to even test
the waters I would end up breaking a promise that I had made to myself
when I was younger. Never cause unnecessary pain to those who are my
heart.

And that would be the risk I would be taking. I don't think I could
bear to hurt you, and it would hurt me if I were to lose what I have
with you now.

It's a risk I'm not willing to take, and I'm sorry for it.

Your Friend