The Librarian's Assistant Chapter 2 of 5 Chapter 2 On Sunday I called Mary and asked if we could get together for lunch. We met at our favorite coffee shop. When Mary saw me she hugged me long and hard and said "Kathy I'm really sorry for what I said the other day. I feel really bad about it. I was just being mean." "No, you were right Mary. I do need some loving. I asked for your response because I was so cold and cranky. I need to apologize to you for being a creep to you." and I hugged her back. "Well, let's just say we both went overboard. Forgive me?" "Yes, Mary and will you forgive me?" "Of course, silly, you're my bud!" Mary said with a smile. Then curiosity got the best of her. "So what's going on? Why do you say that you do need to be loved?" "Well, it's a long story that I don't completely understand myself so I won't try to explain it. I'll just tell you the sordid details (well, not all the details!) and maybe you can give me some explanation." Mary leaned forward as was all ears. I tried to tell her what had happened but was too embarrassed to talk about my dreams or me touching myself and finished saying "So I argued with myself yesterday and concluded I've been a manhater too long and have probably driven away any opportunities that might have come along." "Well I can't disagree with that conclusion. You were never mean but you never made any attempt to look good for a guy. I think you're beautiful but nobody knows it because you hide it under a veil of plainness." and then she said "I hope I'm not being too frank. I'm not trying to be mean. I love you and just want to see you happy." "I know Mary. It's hard to hear what you're saying but I can't disagree with it." I sighed. "The thing I don't understand, Kathy, is why now? What is it that triggered your feelings? Also, I don't think you told me everything..." I blushed beet red. "Umm, well, no, I didn't tell you everything. You're going to think I'm awful." I said partly embarrassed, partly ashamed. "What? You've got to tell me! I can't believe that you could possibly do anything bad." After a long pause where I had to look deep into Mary's eyes to see if I could trust her with my dark secret I finally whispered "I touched myself." "Huh? What do you mean?" Mary looked completely let down. "This is really bad. I, um, touched myself and couldn't help getting excited. You don't think I'm a pervert do you?" I said meekly. "Kathy! Where have you been hiding? This is the 21st century - not the 19th century! EVERYBODY TOUCHES THEMSELVES!" Mary said with emphasis. "Ssssh! Quiet! Don't let everybody hear you." I said trying to discretely look around to see if anyone heard. "What do you mean 'everybody touches themselves'?" I whispered. "Just that." Mary said as if she was dealing with a child. "I've been touching myself since I was 14. I can't believe you just discovered this at 20. I'm sorry I shouldn't have said it this way I'm just so surprised that's all. Kathy I don't think you're a pervert - I'm just glad you've finally entered womanhood!" I was floored! What a revelation! Everybody? I always thought guys did that - my manhater convinced me this was more evidence how perverse they were but women too? And admit it! And enjoy it? "Umm, Mary, uh, do you still touch yourself?" I asked timidly. "You bet! and I love it!" Mary beamed. "In fact, most times it's better than guys! No regrets, no ties, no hassles." Careful, my manhater might like this aspect of it. Got to keep her in check. "I 'liked' it too." I said sheepishly. Mary cracked up and leaned over the table and kissed me. "You're too much Kathy!" Mary leaned back, thought a bit and finally said "but I'm still stuck on what triggered all this. You say you caught this high school kid looking up your skirt?" "Yes." I said blushing and my heart jumped a bit. "He's not a kid. He's eighteen and brilliant." "Oh, and is he a hunk?" Mary asked lustily. "NO! He's a normal guy. Well, he is taller than most of the other boys but regular build otherwise. You'd call him a nerd." "Ok, so this young 'man'" she said with emphasis "looks up your skirt, you catch him, you come home and what?" "Well, I had trouble sleeping and had some dreams." "What did you dream?" Embarrassed now I had to gather my courage "Well, I was sitting on a chair opposite Jimmy and I had my knees up and legs spread." "Hmmm, so 'Jimmy' is the guy from high school. Did you have undies on in your dream?" Shocked I said "Of course I did! What do you think I am? At least in the first dream I did anyway..." I added to my regret. "First dream! You mean you had the same dream but in the second you had no undies on?!" Mary said incredulously. "Quiet! Well, yes, Friday night I dreamt that dream." I admitted blushing a deep deep red. "So what did you dream last night? Did you look at him naked?" "NO! Last night I was too exhausted to dream." "Hmmm, sounds to me you were pretty exhausted Thursday and Friday nights. Maybe last night you were finally satisfied and didn't need to dream?" "Your making me blush Mary!" "I'm sorry, Kathy. This is just so amazing hearing this from you. One thing is clear though." "What's that?" I said hoping for some good advice to get me back to normal. "You have awakened a wild exhibitionist within you." Mary said matter of factly. "WHAT! That can't be me. I've always been conservative and reserved." "Exactly and now, through exhibitionism you're finally awakening." I was stunned. Mary continued "Look, I don't think that's bad. It just is. Some people can't share themselves because they can't open up. You're lucky - you get excited openning up to someone." "I don't know. I'm finding it hard to believe this. How can I know for sure?" "Run an experiment. Find a situation you can control and then slowly try different levels of 'exposure'. I think you'll find what you really like." "An experiment? Situation I can control?" I thought about it. "Well, I guess I could try something with Jimmy. It's clear he's not going to attack me - he was so embarrassed at getting caught he was so apologetic I'm afraid he may not want to be in the same room with me anymore. This is pretty scary - I don't know if I can do it." "Scary yes, but is it exciting too?" Mary asked expecting an honest answer. "Well, yes. Yes it is. It is VERY exciting! Scary AND exciting!" I finally admitted realizing that I was getting excited. "Good! Welcome to the human race my love! I'm glad you're finally here." Mary said and reached out and squeezed my sweaty trembling hand. We finished and I agreed I would let her know what happened with my experiment as I headed home to think about how I was going to 'run' this experiment. As I walked down the street I passed a clothing store I never noticed before. It's probably always been there but I always shopped for 'utility' clothes so never thought about going in a place like this. I thought "what the hell." and went in to take a look. I came out much poorer financially but hopefully more enriched in other ways. ====================================================================== <1st attachment end> ----- ASSM Moderation System Notice------ Notice: This post has been modified from its original format. 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