Jake's Big Bet


Jake spotted his wife as soon as she appeared from behind the sign
that pointed out the parking lot of the Summer House. It was an
unseasonably warm December day. She was wearing the streamlined gray
coat that he had always found particularly flattering. Even if he
hadn't seen the coat or the long, red hair flowing down from under her
white knit hat, he would have recognized her from her gait alone.

He watched her through the floor-to-ceiling window knowing that the
sun was reflecting off the glass, making it impossible for her to see
him. Motherhood had changed her, but not in any way that made her less
beautiful. If anything, she looked like she'd finally grown into her
frame. As beautiful as she'd been when they first met, there had been
something impossibly ephemeral about her beauty. These things might be
easier if she'd faded with time instead of becoming more beautiful.

There was something unusual about the way she walked up the path. It
took Jake a minute to recognize what was different. Her step was
lighter and more confident than it had been in a long time. In short,
it was unusual in that it was the gait he'd gotten used to seeing for
nearly four years before things started to go wrong.

At first, he thought she must have taken another lover. But, her arms
swung freely at her sides and there was no sense of furtiveness about
her. Since no one was watching him, he allowed himself a small sigh of
relief. He didn't know why it mattered to him now, but it did.

If it wasn't another affair, it probably meant that she'd come to an
important decision. Of course, Jake didn't need to read her body
language to figure that out. She'd called him and asked him to join
her for lunch after two weeks of only talking through lawyers.

He looked to see if Hazel was leaning forward as she walked. It would
indicate that she was scrapping for a fight. But, she'd already
entered the restaurant while he was thinking.

Rising, he went to the entry room where Hazel was handing her coat to
the check girl. When she saw Jake, she smiled. It wasn't the most
radiant smile he'd ever seen on her face, but it seemed genuine, which
was puzzling in and of itself.

Having been relieved of her coat, she put a hand on Jake's arm, went
up on tiptoes, and kissed him on the cheek. Jake watched her
suspiciously, but was too surprised by the gesture to hide the
expression on his face.

"Don't scowl at me, Jake," she said gaily. "You're not going to scare
me, but you might make the flowers wilt."

Jake let his face fall back to its traditional neutrality, "How are
you, Hazel? You look well."

"I feel well," she said. "Have you gotten a table yet?"

"No," he said. "I was sitting in the solarium."

"Good," she said. "We should be able to get a table in the garden. By
the way, how did you know about this place?"

"I've been here on business," said Jake. "I never got to eat here,
though. I thought it looked interesting."

Hazel slapped him gently on the arm, "You should have told me sooner.
If I'd known, we could have come here together."

Jake didn't bother to point out that they were here together now. He
knew what she meant. As he watched her walk towards the back door, he
wondered if picking this place had been a tactical error. He'd only
been here on business once. When he drove up, he saw her car in the
parking lot. At the time, it had been two months since he'd realized
that she was sleeping with another man. If he'd gone into the dining
area, he could have seen who that man was. He didn't go. Since he had
no intention of doing anything about the other man, it did him no good
to know who it was. Besides, he didn't particularly blame Hazel for
sleeping around at that point. They'd been unhappy together for a long
time. She never left their son alone for her dalliances. And, two or
three nights a week, it gave him a night he could spend alone with his
son and not have to worry that he and Hazel would get into another
screaming match.

Still, when Hazel had asked Jake to meet her at some neutral location
without their lawyers, this had been the first place he'd thought of.
He'd suggested it because he knew she wouldn't be able to admit her
reason for not wanting to meet there and it might keep her off balance
to be on the site of her infidelity.

It had seemed reasonable to expect that he would want her off balance.
Two weeks ago, Hazel had served him with divorce papers. More than a
month ago, she'd waited until he went to work, packed up their son,
left their apartment in Boston, and come back to their house in
Mannsborough.

"How's Darwin?" Jake asked as they sat down.

"He's doing well," said Hazel. "He's with my sister right now."

"Your sister is in town?"

Hazel nodded, "She came in last week to help me out with...things."

"So," asked Jake. "What did you want to see me about?"

Hazel looked at him over her menu as if she were about to impart a
great secret. She looked almost mischievous, "Jake, can I ask you a
favor?"

Jake considered the question. Eleven days ago, in a particularly
brutal blow up, this woman had called him a "hollow second-hander," a
"fraud," and a "rapacious looter." That had been the last day that
he'd seriously considered fighting the divorce. Since then, he hadn't
been in much of a mood to do her any favors.

If there had been less at stake, he might have told her no. He was
angry and wanted to lash out like she had. But, he had to do whatever
it took to get custody of Darwin.

Of course, if he had told her that, she would have taken everything
and fought for custody. So, he played it close to the vest and he
played it by the book.

"What favor, Hazel?"

"Could we just have lunch together and not talk about the divorce?"

Jake considered the request. Was she trying to get his guard down so
that he would say something she could use against him later? When
she'd first asked for this meeting, Jake had been confused enough to
call Anders back at the office and ask his advice.

"Don't go," said Anders. "You have lawyers. That's what they're for."

"I've already decided to go," said Jake. "How can I handle the
meeting?"

"Wear a wire," said Anders.

"Christ, Andy. Be serious."

"I am serious," said Anders. "Jake, this is not the woman you fell in
love with. Once a woman decides to divorce you, particularly if there
are children involved, she becomes like a wounded animal. She'll do
anything to keep Darwin. Has she accused you of molesting him yet?"

"No," said Jake. "And she won't. I know how bad your split with
Katrina was. But, Hazel isn't capable of that level of malice."

"All right," said Anders. "Obviously, you know her better than I do.
Just keep in mind that every man who's ever been through a divorce has
been surprised by the level of malice his wife was capable of."

Jake sighed, "I'm not wearing a wire."

"Well," said Anders. "You'd better assume that she is, then."

"She's not..."

"Right," said Anders. "She's not capable of that. All right, then.
Behave like she's wearing a wire. If you say anything incriminating,
she'll remember it all the way to court."

Jake considered that conversation now as Hazel ordered her drink.
Could she be wearing a wire?

Still, Jake knew that, if it came down to a question of who could play
it cooler, he had the edge. So, he said, "I would like that, Hazel.
But, I can't promise. It's been on my mind a lot lately."

She smiled a little at his joke, "We have been kind of rough on each
other lately, haven't we?"

Jake nodded. Admitting that they'd been hard on each other during
divorce negotiations wasn't liable to surprise anyone, but the less he
said out loud, the better.

"You're scowling at me again," she said. "But, it's not going to work.
I'm in too good a mood."

"What do you have to be in such a good mood about?"

"It's a secret," she said. There was definitely mischief in her eyes
this time.

As tempted as he was to go along with the farce of amicability, he
decided to see if her good mood were real by throwing out a line to
gauge her reaction.

"You can tell me," he said. "Did you convince the city to close down a
soup kitchen?"

Hazel laughed somewhat harder than the joke really warranted. But, the
laughter was tinged with genuine relief, "God, I've missed your sense
of humor. Can you remember the last time we shared a joke?"

"It's been a long time," he said.

"Jake, I'm sorry I put you and Darwin through all of this. It's almost
over. I promise."

Jake knew that his concern was showing in his face, but he couldn't
help it, "Hazel, are you all right?"

Her smile didn't falter, "I told you. I'm in the best mood I've been
in since...well, I don't know when. The last time I can remember being
this happy was right after we first met."

"What happened then?" asked Jake. "As I remember, we knew each other
for six months before you would give me the time of day."

She brushed a stray lock of hair out of her face, "All right--not
after we first met. I meant after that day at the cottage. It wasn't
six months."

"We met the day you walked out of Dr. Collins's macroeconomics class.
That day at the cottage was in late June."

"June twenty-second," said Hazel.

                                      -=-
                                      
Jake looked down at the syllabus he'd been handed and scowled. He'd
signed up for macroeconomics with Dr. Alan Collins. When he arrived in
class, he found that, instead of Dr. Collins, the class was being
taught by an unknown adjunct whose primary claim to fame was that he
had served in the treasury department of the state of Massachusetts.
Jake had chosen the section based on the recommendation of a friend
who was an economics major with whom he shared many convictions.

"I want you all to look over the syllabus and let me know if there are
any questions," said the adjunct.

Jake raised his hand to ask what had happened to Dr. Collins. As he
did so, a voice rang out behind him, "It looks like you're assigning
reading from John Maynard Keynes, John Gailbraith, Karl Marx, and
Josef Engels."

"That's correct," said the adjunct.

"When we're finished with these readings, will we be learning any
actual economics?"

The adjunct looked puzzled, "What do you mean?"

"I mean," said the young woman who had spoken, "that, if I wanted to
learn the precepts of socialism and be berated for wanting to keep
what I earn, I would have been a women's studies major." She had risen
as she spoke and, before the adjunct could close his mouth, made it to
the doorway.

"Sit down," the adjunct said angrily when he found his voice.

She had a good head of steam. But, when the adjunct spoke, she stopped
on a dime, turned and glared at him. The man actually took a step
backwards even though they were about thirty feet apart.

"You may be under the impression that you are teaching high school
students," she said quietly. "You clearly think that your job is to
fill empty heads with dogma. But, you will not speak to me like that."

Having said her peace, she turned on her heel again and marched out.

There was some scattered applause around the room. Jake suspected it
was for the wrong reasons.

"Well," said the adjunct, his face flushed, his chest puffed out. "If
anyone else feels that way, they should go now. Because..."

Jake rose. He'd decided to drop the class as soon as he saw the
syllabus. He would have done it quietly at the break. But, he had seen
his future. And, he wanted to meet her before she got away. So, he
rose and, in the face of the man's increasing apoplexy, followed her
out.

He caught up with her as she was winding a long scarf around her neck
to brave the cold outside. Hearing his footsteps approaching, she
turned and watched him approach.

The stare was unnerving. Jake as a freshman didn't have the composure
he'd learned today. Nearly to her, he called out, "Hey."

She arched a single eyebrow at him, "Yes?"

He stopped where he was standing, a good two yards away from her. What
had he meant to say?

She gave him a sardonic smile and turned to go.

"Wait," he said, alarmed. "Please. What's your name?"

She smiled at him, green eyes glinting with amusement, "Hazel. What's
yours?"

"Jake. Jake Steiner."

She seemed to roll the name around on her tongue, "Jake Steiner. Are
you Jewish?"

Jake nodded, "Yes."

She frowned, "By inclination or by birth?"

Jake wondered what answer she wanted. He might have been offended by
the line of questioning, but had never particularly identified with
his heritage. Most people assumed he was Italian.

With no guidance as to how to finesse his answer for a more favorable
impression, he elected to go with the truth, "I'm Jewish because my
mother is Jewish. In matters of faith, I'm agnostic."

"Not atheist?" When Jake shook his head, she asked, "Why not?"

"I don't see any negative EV in hedging my bets."

"Negative EV?"

Jake wanted to smack himself for slipping into unfamiliar jargon.
There was something about Hazel that made him feel like he was twelve
years old again. But, he explained, "It's a poker term. In other
words, I don't see any disadvantage to staying open to the possibility
that God exists."

"You play poker?" She looked mildly interested.

Figuring this may be the best response he was going to get from her,
he said, "If I may make a suggestion, would you like to continue this
cross-examination over a cup of coffee?"

Hazel looked a little bit sad, "I'm sorry. I don't drink coffee. And,
while you seem nice enough, I'm really looking for a man who can stand
by his convictions. It was nice meeting you, Jake." Again, she turned
to go.

"Because I'm an agnostic?"

She nodded, "I'm afraid so. We just wouldn't be philosophically
compatible."

Suddenly, a light went off in Jake's head. He knew part of what made
this young woman tick. Thinking quickly, he said, "What I mean is that
I don't believe in God. But, if someone could prove logically that He
existed..." He shrugged.

Hazel turned back towards him, "That doesn't seem very likely."

Jake nodded, "I agree. But, it's reasonable to assume that unlikely
does not equal impossible."

"I drink tea," she said.

Jake smiled, "I know just the place."

                                      -=-
                                      
It took nearly an hour over coffee and tea for Jake to say something
else "philosophically incompatible." He'd known that he would. Hazel's
terminology marked her as a fan of the writings of Ayn Rand; her zeal
marked her as a recent convert. Jake was too cynical, even at
nineteen, to wholly embrace any philosophy.

His mistake came when Hazel fumed about the adjunct. Wanting to show
off his knowledge of economics, he agreed with her on most points, but
rose to the defense of Gailbraith. Once he did, Hazel got quiet and
less animated.

Jake had enough self-possession not to stammer or dig himself in
deeper. Instead, he changed the subject before she could say something
she would have a hard time taking back.

"Do you take any art classes?" he asked.

"No," she said. "I'm not interested in a looking at pictures of
made-up saints or being told how profound it is when Jackson Pollock
sneezes on a canvas."

"Me neither," agreed Jake amiably. "I'm only in the art department
because that's where Johnson College categorizes architecture."

"You're an architect?" Hazel asked. Her eyes lit up.

Jake nodded, "I will be soon, once I've learned all they can teach me
here. Do you study architecture?"

Hazel shook her head, "I'm still undecided on my major. I'm going to
be a writer, but don't think I could stand to try and get an English
degree."

Having dodged one conversational bullet and made a favorable
impression, Jake decided to exit before he ruined it. Rising, he said,
"I need to get going. I want to find a good section of macroeconomics
before they all fill up."

He walked Hazel back to her dorm. The way she held herself was too
rigid and stand-offish for Jake to think an attempt to kiss her would
result in anything but failure. Even a hug would have been chancy, so
he smiled at her and offered no physical contact.

"I'm over in Collins," he commented. "We're practically neighbors. I'm
sure I'll be seeing you around, Hazel. It was nice meeting you."

"Jake?"

Jake suppressed a smile at the tone of her voice, "Yes?"

"If you find a good section of macroeconomics, would you call me,
please?"

Jake didn't know if this was another test, but he knew the answer if
it was, "If I find one with two open slots, sure."

                                      -=-
                                      
After their lunch had come, Hazel said, "As I remember, I gave you far
more than the time of day long before that day in the cottage. We
talked at least once a week for a while."

Jake laughed, "That's true. And, you kept me on my toes the whole
time. Then, you got really mad at me over a minor philosophical
difference."

Hazel looked at him out of the corner of her eye, "It was hardly
minor. What was it about again?"

"As I recall," said Jake. "you argued fervently that popularity was a
quantifiable measure of quality--that the more people were willing to
pay for something, the better it must be."

"I remember," said Hazel. "And you argued that my case meant that
Britney Spears was a thousand times as good as the New York City
Opera."

"I think you're half right," said Jake. "I mentioned the opera because
I had bought tickets. But, Britney Spears would have been about eleven
at the time."

Hazel raised an eyebrow, "You had opera tickets?"

Jake nodded, "I was about to ask you to come and see Carmen with me.
But, you got really angry and refused to talk to me for like three
weeks."

Hazel smiled at the memory, "I only refused to talk to you for a
couple of days. But, you were so damned stubborn, you wouldn't call
me."

Jake chuckled, "That's not quite how I remember it."

                                      -=-
                                      
Doug looked up in alarm when Jake slammed the door to their room on
the way in.

"Dude, I was sleeping," he said.

"Sorry," said Jake. "Door must have slipped out of my hand as I was
closing it."

Doug wasn't buying it, "I take it she turned down your offer of a
night at the opera."

Jake paced around the small room, "I didn't even get to make the
offer. She is so goddamned intractable."

"You knew that the day you met her," Doug pointed out. "Why are you
pissed about it now?"

Jake started to try to explain the nature of the argument. But, he
gave up after a few sentences, "Never mind. It was a pretty minor
philosophical point. It's not important. We've been farther apart on
bigger issues. What it comes down to is that we finally started to get
close, she got scared, and found an excuse to fight."

"This is like a Mount Everest thing, isn't it?" Doug asked.

"Not really," said Jake. "In her unguarded moments, she's amazing.
And, I usually don't mind the dogmatic aspects. It shows a certain
depth of passion that's locked away inside of her. But, she's using it
to make sure I never get the key to that lock."

Doug looked him up and down, "You know, Jake. You're not a bad looking
guy."

Jake smirked, "Thanks, Doug. But, I just broke up with Hazel. And,
besides, I make it a rule not to date my roommates."

Doug rolled his eyes, "Very funny. I just meant that you've put an
awful lot of time into chasing one filly when I've seen at least two
girls throw themselves at you. And, I'm sure you could have had a ton
more. Is this girl really worth it?"

"I thought so," said Jake. "But, I don't think anybody would be good
enough for Hazel fucking Andrews."

"So," said Doug. "Come with me to the Delta Tau Delta party tonight.
Wanda Pinskie will be there."

Jake considered the offer for about five seconds, "Yeah. All right.
Let's go."

Over the next three weeks, Jake did his best to forget about Hazel
Andrews. It turned out not to be nearly as hard as he thought. When he
saw her again, she was sitting alone in a coffee shop they'd
frequented several times together.

"Hey, Jake."

He nodded at her coolly, "Hello, Hazel."

"Are you here alone?"

He nodded again, "Yeah. You?"

She nodded, "I was just looking for somewhere quiet to read. Would you
like to join me?"

"All right," said Jake. He'd given up on pursuing any kind of romance
with Hazel, but there was no reason to shun her. "What are you
reading?"

Hazel showed him. Jake nodded, "'The Romantic Manifesto.' I always
found that one kind of dry."

"Me too," agreed Hazel. "But, there are some passages I never quite
understood. What do you think she meant when she wrote..."

Jake raised his hands, "You know, I'm not really up to arguing
philosophy today. Maybe we could talk about normal, human things."

"I guess we can do that," Hazel said doubtfully. "What have you been
up to in the last few weeks?"

Jake gave her an abbreviated version of events. Most of what he'd done
the last three weeks had amounted to a series of meaningless
encounters with women who weren't looking to make a connection with
him.

"That's great," she said. "You're looking good, Jake."

Hazel was being so normal that, for a moment, Jake considered trying
to ask her out again. But, he pushed the thought aside. She was too
skittish, too ready to bolt. If they did go out, she would just find
another excuse to fight and run away again.

"You're looking tired," he said. "Is everything all right?"

Hazel shook her head, "I've been having trouble sleeping. I'm starting
to wonder if I should be at college. And, it's keeping me up at
night."

Jake frowned, "Damn, Hazel. If you don't belong at college, who does?"

"I don't mean that I can't hack it," said Hazel. "I just wonder if
there's anything worth learning here."

Jake shrugged noncommittally, "I can't really decide that for you. I
feel like I'm learning plenty."

Hazel looked down into her empty cup, "I should get going. Jake, would
you like to grab some dinner tomorrow? We could talk about anything
you like. We don't have to argue philosophy."

Jake shook his head sadly, "I don't think that would be a good idea,
Hazel."

"Oh," she said quietly. "All right."

Seeing her deflated like that, Jake's heart went out to her. She'd
caught his attention by being so clearly strong and independent. He
knew he should be rid of her, but couldn't. So, he said, "I've got a
study group tomorrow. How about Saturday?"

Hazel's smile lit up her face like the sun coming out from behind a
cloud, "Sure. That would be great."

After their first date, Hazel let Jake kiss her. Once kissed, she
warmed up to it. But, before he kissed her, she seemed to be bracing
herself for something unpleasant.

After the second date, they fooled around on her bed. This time, there
was no reluctance. Hazel was a willing, even eager participant. Things
had progressed quickly. Jake was patient, Hazel less so. By the end of
the evening, she lay naked on her bed while Jake was down to his
pants. When he stroked her stomach and hips, Hazel took his hand and
placed it between her legs. But, when Jake tried to follow his hand
some time later with his tongue, she pushed him away. Jake didn't push
his luck.

Their third date, they fooled around again, but in one of the lounges
where they were limited to kissing and some furtive over-the-clothes
touching.

On their fourth date, Hazel found another excuse to fight and broke up
with him.

It was early spring before Jake heard from Hazel again. She called
him.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Jake, I miss you."

Jake rubbed his temples, "I miss you too, Hazel. But, we're not good
for each other."

"You were good for me."

Jake took a deep breath, "No, I wasn't."

"Jake, what's wrong with me? I thought we were pretty good together.
Tell me the truth."

"The truth?" Jake asked doubtfully.

"Please," said Hazel. "I want to know."

"If I tell you the truth, I'm just going to sound like some horny frat
boy trying to get into your pants."

"I know better," said Hazel. "Please, Jake. I need to know."

Jake took a deep breath and said, "You seem scared of intimacy. Every
time we get too close for your comfort, you find some excuse to push
me away."

There was a long silence before Hazel answered. Then, she said, "I
could work on that."

Jake shook his head, even though Hazel obviously couldn't see him.
Then, he said, "You should. But, I can't be there for it. I do hope
you find happiness, Hazel. I really do."

He spent the next two weeks moping from class to class. This time, the
idea of jumping from party to party and woman to woman didn't appeal
to him. He even started to coast in class, knowing that his grades
from earlier in the semester would carry him through to a passing
grade with a minimum of effort.

Then, one day, he looked up in his life drawing class and there she
was. She had just dropped her robe and was standing on the model's
pedestal as naked as the day she was born and staring at him, her eyes
narrowed with challenge, an enigmatic smile on her face.

After she was done posing, she came over to where Jake was drawing and
looked at his drawing, "You do good work."

Jake chuckled, "It's not made-up saints or Jackson Pollock's sneeze,
but I like it."

Standing close to him, she was dressed in a green, silk robe. Now, she
let it fall open as if she didn't notice, "Can we get together some
time?"

Jake didn't have to look at her or his drawing. What she looked like
naked was burned into his memory from the first time he'd seen here
that way. Taking a deep breath, he said, "All right."

They went out again for the rest of the semester. This time around,
Jake sat her down and read her the riot act about expressing what she
wanted and how far she was comfortable going. After that, things
continued apace. But, as finals week rolled around, she started to
become distant again and complain that things they'd been doing for
weeks made her uncomfortable.

Jake was ready to break up with her for good, but decided to let
things continue until the end of the year because it was easier than
breaking up during finals.

Halfway through finals week, Hazel asked Jake, "Have you done any
contracting?"

"Some," said Jake having an odd feeling of deja vu.

"My family has this summer cottage down by Atlantic City that needs
some work. I'll be staying there this summer. Is there any chance I
could talk you into doing some work on it and taking room and board as
partial payment?"

Jake looked her in the eyes. They contained a clear challenge. Against
his better judgment, he said, "All right."

                                      -=-
                                      
Jake thought he knew what Hazel was angling for. He'd suspected it
since their first contrived fight. But, he chose to ignore it, hoping
that he could keep Hazel through traditional means. Now, he felt the
gauntlet had been thrown. Any woman as obsessed with The Fountainhead
as she was couldn't possibly drop all the hints she had and not expect
him to get the message.

And the message was, "I want it like it is in the book. If you want
me, take me. But, don't ask me to give myself to you."

As appealing as the fantasy was, Jake wavered back and forth on
deciding whether or not that was what she wanted. If he tried it and
was wrong, he would certainly ruin what they had and might even end up
going to jail.

He decided reluctantly to take a wait and see attitude. A part of
himself--a big part--told him that he was being played for a sap. But,
the rest of him firmly told that part to shut up. He was happy being
around Hazel and, with the alternative being returning to Mannsborough
where his parents were going through a messy divorce, a few weeks at
the beach with a coltish, but intriguing young woman looked pretty
good.

                                      -=-

Jake was standing in his bedroom with his arms crossed, looking out
the window pensively.

"What are you doing?" Hazel asked. She was dressed in blue jeans and a
green bikini top that matched her eyes. "I thought you were going to
get ready for the beach."

Jake looked up towards the sky, "It's about to start raining."

Hazel came up and looked where he was looking, "There's not a cloud in
the sky. And, the Weather Channel says today's going to be sunny and
beautiful."

"The barometer is plummeting," said Jake. "I can feel it in the air.
It's going to open up any minute."

"Jake," she chided gently. "You don't believe those old wives' tales.
Do you?"

Jake smiled at her. Once, she would have been far more contemptuous of
him if he'd suggested he could predict the weather better than the
machines of the National Weather Service. As if on cue, the first
crack of thunder rolled ominously in the distance.

"It's probably just heat lightning," Hazel opined. She might have been
more convincing if the last syllable of her sentence hadn't been cut
off by a whipcrack of thunder, much closer this time.

"All right," said Jake. "I'll just get ready for the beach, then."

The quality of light was already changing as thunderheads started to
form at an alarming rate. Hazel finally looked doubtful, "Maybe we
should check the Weather Channel again."

"Yeah," said Jake. "Then, it can tell us when it starts raining so
we'll know we're actually wet."

Hazel scowled, but there wasn't much behind it, "I mean so that we can
see if it's going to be a flash flood or a long storm."

"It feels like it's going to be a bad one," said Jake.

Hazel didn't comment. She stretched out on her on his bed stomach and
flicked on the TV. Jake sat down next to her on the bed, bemused. When
the first raindrops pattered against the roof, the television was
still predicting, "sunny and breezy."

"Damn," said Hazel, rolling on her back and looking up at him with a
pout. "I really wanted to go swimming. Now what are we going to do?"

"Well," said Jake, refusing to take the bait, "if you really want to
go swimming, I suspect that the side yard will be flooded pretty
soon."

Hazel sat up so that their torsos were almost touching. Jake's
nostrils filled with the scent she was wearing--something floral and
summery. She laid a hand on his shoulder, "I meant that I want to go
to the beach. Mr. Weather Man, is there any way I could convince you
to do your 'rain go away' dance to appease the wrath you have called
down from the heavens for my having doubted your divinatory skills.

Jake took the back of her head in one hand and kissed her. It was a
long, slow lingering kiss that implied a long storm to come as clearly
as the thunderheads building up outside.

But, when she broke the kiss, she pulled away from him. Her eyes
weren't on him. They were on a shelf he'd put up in the room earlier
in the week.
                                      
"What in the hell did you do here?" she asked, rising up off of the
bed.

Jake said unnecessarily, "I put up a shelf."

"It's clearly crooked," she announced imperiously. "Take it down and
put it back up straight."

Jake, his mind still clouded by the kiss and the abrupt change in
attitude, stood up next to her, getting annoyed, "It's perfectly
straight. I made sure of it. I'll get my level and show you."

As he turned to go, Hazel grabbed his arm. When he turned to face her,
she wasn't at all imperious. Her eyes were imploring, but held a hint
of barely-contained mischief as well. Quitely, she said again, "Take
it down."

Jake felt incredibly dense for not catching on sooner what she was
trying to do. The feeling lasted only a moment, though, quickly
replaced by a sense of long-suppressed urgency. The arm she wasn't
holding snaked out. He caught her chin roughly in his hand, but was
careful not to hurt her. Hazel's mouth opened in surprise just as he
crushed her mouth with a kiss.

Hazel didn't try to pull away until Jake's other arm was firmly around
her waist. Then, she broke the kiss by pushing against his chest with
both hands. Jake let the hand holding her chin go so that he could
hold her around the waist with both arms.

"Let go of me, you savage," she hissed. Jake didn't. Instead, he put
both hands around her waist and forced her to lie back on the bed,
using his size to keep her from bolting.

On the bed, he straddled Hazel at the waist, leaned down and kissed
her again. Her hands balled into fists and pounded on his shoulders.
But, as the kiss went on and his hands started to roam over her body,
she unclenched her fists and stroked the muscles of his back through
his shirt.

Knowing he was crossing the point of no return, Jake slid Hazel's top
off and was relieved when she lifted her head to make it easier to
slide off. When his head went to her breast, Hazel made an animal
noise in the back of her throat. As he teased the nipple with tongue
and teeth, she moaned his name and undulated beneath him.

While he had her writhing and moaning, Jake unbuttoned and stripped
off his own shirt. Hazel drew away from his attentions to plant a
flurry of kissed on his chest. At the same time, her hands eagerly
worked at his belt and stripped off his pants.

But, when his hands went to her pants, Hazel grabbed his wrists. Jake
was undeterred, unzipping her pants, then shucking them in a neat
motion.

"Savage," she hissed. "Monster."

Jake chuckled, taking her hands from his wrists and pinning them above
her head in one of his own hands, "At your service." His other hand
parted her legs easily, one finger sliding inside of her, working the
length of her, and teasing her clit.

In Jake's memory, the storm he had unleashed in Hazel was far more
impressive than the one outside. Even as the thunder worked its way to
a furious, rolling, cracking crescendo, Hazel's body seemed to be
threatening to consume itself in its own passion. She panted,
squealed, and moaned with an abandon nearly diametrically opposed to
the way she comported herself in daily life. Although Jake knew that
she would be insulted if he said it out loud, he could not help but
think that she was losing the tightly-wound mask of a civilized human
and becoming more like an animal by the moment.

When he positioned his body behind his hand, she wrapped her legs
around his waist, pulling him in. Jake pulled his hand away, letting
the motion draw him in, and guided himself into her.

In his most improbably fantasies, it had never been like this with
Hazel. When he imagined such things, he seduced her and they made
love. If he imagined her coming, it was in a ladylike, almost demure
way with a minimum of fuss.

Jake had never misread a person more completely. Once he was inside of
her, Hazel bit and scratched at him. She clung to him. And, when she
came, she howled, matching the wind before drowning it out.

                                      -=-

"You're smiling," said Hazel. "It's been a long time since I've seen
you smile."

Jake hadn't realized he was smiling. Regaining his composure, he said,
"I haven't had a lot to smile about recently. Neither have you, I
would think. But, you're...you're being conciliatory."

Hazel gave him a dirty look, "You take that back."

"I mean it," said Jake. "You are. And, I've never seen you
conciliatory. That's why I wonder if you're feeling all right."

"Finish your lunch," said Hazel. "And I'll tell you all about it."

                                      -=-

After that stormy afternoon in the summer cottage, Jake kept waiting
for a manufactured blow-up that never came. It took him almost a year
to relax and accept that, once a certain threshold of intimacy had
been reached, she stopped trying to push him away.

They ended up staying in the cottage the whole summer. By the time
sophomore year came, she was a changed woman. She wasn't a different
woman. She remained proud, headstrong, and fiercely combative. But,
she relaxed. Now, when they fought, they invariably ended up fucking
like wild animals. Of course, no one who hadn't heard her would have
believed it. Still, dorm walls were thin enough that, as quiet as they
had tried to be, her enthusiasm was soon a running joke among Jake's
friends. Once she got over her initial embarrassment, Hazel took it
with good humor.

More incredibly to Jake, she continued to pose for life drawing
classes, even though Jake wasn't taking them any more. When he asked
her about it, she countered with a question.

"Jake, do you think I'm beautiful?"

"Exceptionally."

"I won't always be beautiful," she said. When Jake opened his mouth to
speak, she went on, "You don't need to reassure me with platitudes.
It's a fact of life. I just like the idea that, when I'm old and
leathery, I'll still be young and pretty somewhere. Besides, Ms.
Martinez, for all her godawful politics, actually teaches people to
draw the human body as it is, not to some standard of awfulness. That
must be a good thing. Right?"

The summer after sophomore year, they'd spent two weeks visiting his
father in Mannsborough. After a few days, Jake noticed that his father
was unusually quiet.

"Something up, pop?"

His father shook his head, "Nothing worth talking about."

"Try me," said Jake. "I got time."

"You really like this Hazel girl. Don't you?"

Jake grinned, "Yeah. I really do."

"She's a real firecracker. Isn't she?"

Jake nodded, knowing what his father was getting at, "She takes some
getting used to. But, she's got a good heart."

His father nodded and smiled back, "I'm glad she makes you happy."

"She does, Dad. She really does."

"So," said his father. "You still planning on going to Atlantic City
for your twenty-first?"

"I wouldn't miss it," said Jake. "I'm tired of playing poker with
college kids."

"Just remember," his father admonished him. "Don't play with money you
can't afford to lose. Nobody wins all the time."

After Mannsborough, they went to Washington D.C. It would have seemed
an improbable location for either of them to summer. But, Hazel had
been awarded an internship with the CATO Institute, a libertarian
think tank. 

Jake took a bus to Atlantic City to arrive just after midnight on his
twenty-first birthday. Hazel came up a few days later after work. As
she would tell Jake later, she stopped at the hotel, took a long nap,
then came to the casino looking for him. By the time she found him, it
was close to 3 AM on Saturday morning. Jake had been at the table for
fifteen hours straight and hadn't shaved since he'd arrived on
Wednesday.

"Jake," she said quietly. "Can I talk to you a minute?"

Jake mucked a moderately bad hand, rose, and said, "Deal around me for
a bit." As he walked away from the table, he caught several
sympathetic looks for the other players.

"Am I right in thinking those black chips are a hundred dollars?" she
asked.

Jake nodded, "And the green ones are twenty-five. The red ones are
five. The pink ones are two-fifty. The white ones are a dollar."

"And, are all those chips in front of you yours?"

Jake nodded again, "Yeah. I'm up to about four thousand today."

"How much did you start with?"

"A thousand," said Jake.

"So, you're up three thousand dollars?"

"No," said Jake. "I'm up thirty-five hundred dollars today. It's been
a really good night. There was a boxing match earlier. A lot of the
sports betters showed up in a good mood and flush with cash."

"So, how are you doing for the week?"

Jake calculated, "I'm up about seven thousand total."

Hazel looked around them, "Seven thousand dollars?"

Jake nodded, "It turned out to be a lot easier than I thought. Most
people who play poker here don't know what they're doing."

She put an arm around the back of his neck, kissed him, and whispered
in his ear, "I am so hot for you right now. If you threw me down on
one of the empty poker tables and fucked the hell out of me right
here, do you think they would throw us out?"

"Probably," said Jake. "They're very sensitive about howling while
people are trying to gamble."

Hazel frowned, disappointed, "All right, then. When do you think
you'll be done?"

Jake laughed, "I'm done now. How the hell am I supposed to think about
poker now?"

"Sorry," said Hazel looking not-at-all-sorry.

They barely made it back to the hotel. Hazel tried to drag Jake down
to the beach off the boardwalk, but he doubted he would be able to
stay awake after what she had in mind and didn't want to spend the
rest of the night sleeping on the beach with thousands of dollars in
his pocket.

As it stood, she was as hot for it as she'd ever been. In hindsight,
Jake knew why. Hazel was aroused by any competition that required you
to use your brain. She was aroused by the idea of winning. And, she
was aroused by money. In the latter, she was hardly unusual. What was
unusual was that she was completely without shame about being aroused
by money.

She didn't ask Jake to spread it out on the bed before he fucked her.
But, he didn't wait for Jake to spread her out on the bed. She ended
up on her knees, bent over the edge of the bed, biting the hand that
Jake clamped over her mouth to avoid getting thrown out on a noise
complaint.

That weekend was the happiest Jake could remember. Even at the cottage
after the first time they'd slept together, he'd been waiting for the
other shoe to drop. This time, he spent the next two days having
intense, passionate sex with the love of his life and the evenings in
the casino, discovering the second greatest love of his life. Best of
all, Hazel not only wasn't jealous of poker, she could get physically
aroused listening to him talk about it. With the two greatest loves of
his life working so well together, he was certain there was no man in
the world as blessed as he was.

The money had a real impact on their life, too. They'd been staying in
a tiny apartment in Adam's Morgan that made their dorm rooms look
plush by comparison. Now, they took a sublet in Georgetown. Their
neighbors all seemed to work in the White House or the Congressional
Building. Hazel referred to the place as the "Belly of the Beast" and
in the privacy of their apartment, actually admitted of one couple,
"For second handers and looters who suck on the government teat to
make a living, they're lovely people."

Jake found a Tuesday night poker game in the building and a Thursday
one in another building a few hours away. Considering how bad the
players were, they played for awfully high stakes.

By the end of summer, Jake had accumulated enough money for them to
reasonably live together off campus and then some. He declined
work-study junior year and started traveling to New York and Atlantic
City on weekends and holidays to play poker. As often as she could,
Hazel joined him. He didn't win all the time, but he won more often
than he lost and made more in the first half of the year than he could
have expected to if he had been a junior architect.

Everything had been going fine until he came home from one weekend in
which Hazel hadn't joined him, saying only that she had "things to
do," and found her sitting on their couch, crying.

He drew her into his arms, held her, and soothed her. He didn't ask
what was wrong.

Once she'd mostly stopped crying, she said, "Jake, I'm pretty sure
that I'm going to have a baby."

Jake had been ready for her to say several possible things. In his
mind, this was far from the worst.

"Okay," he said calmly. "So, we're having a baby."

She burst into tears again. Jake held her, letting her cry herself
out.

"What do you want me to do about it?" she asked.

Her second bout of crying had given him time to anticipate that
question. He said, "I don't want you to do anything about it except
what you decide to do. Whatever it is, I'll support you." He rose,
"Let me get you some more tissues."

"I want to keep it," she said as he was coming back. "I'm not ready to
be a mother. I don't know if I'll ever be ready. I can't even imagine
myself as a mother. But, there's a life growing inside of me."

Jake nodded. Abortion was one of the subjects over which they'd argued
most passionately. He was pro choice. Hazel was deeply disquieted by
the concept of abortion, but horrified by the idea that the government
would try to legislate an issue that was so clearly a moral gray area.

"Then, we need to make plans," said Jake. "Have you seen a doctor?"

Hazel nodded, "Yesterday."

"How far along are you?"

"About six weeks," said Hazel. "It's hard to say because there are a
lot of possible...incidents during that time period and none of them
have any particular red flags."

Jake did a quick calculation, "That'll put the due date in late July,
early August."

Hazel nodded, seemingly calmer now that they were approaching the
issue rationally. Jake offered her the fresh box of tissues. She
reached for one and tugged. It popped out of the box. Attached to the
bottom of it was a square, black, felt jewelry box.

As Hazel recognized it, she held it in quaking hands and looked at
him, "Is this what I think it is?"

"I don't know," said Jake. "If you think it's a new processor for your
computer, probably not. Why don't you open it?"

She did, her eyes widening when she saw the ring. She sat, entranced
for a few long seconds. Then, seeming to brace herself for something
distasteful, she snapped the box shut.

"Jake, I don't want to get married because I'm pregnant."

Jake gave her his best smile, "Neither do I. There's not a jeweler on
demand in our bathroom, you know. I've had that for a while. I was
going to wait until the winter break to give it to you, but tonight
seemed more appropriate.

Hazel wrapped her arms around Jake's neck, "Jake, I love you so much."

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes," said Hazel. She kissed him on the mouth, "yes yes yes yes yes."

They didn't get any planning done that night. Instead, they wound up
making love in a most vigorous way. Jake, still new to the idea of
being with his pregnant fiancee, tried to be gentle, but that had
never been their way and Hazel refused to let him start now.

When she miscarried in March, Jake considered blaming a lot of things,
including how rough they'd been in bed. As many times as he was told
that it was extremely unlikely, he couldn't get the idea out of his
head.

They married in early June as they had planned. Jake met Hazel's
parents for the first and only time. They were quiet, unassuming,
Midwestern people who seemed to have nothing in common with their
daughter other than their coloration. He also met her grandfather, who
was a giant of a man that had been a minor oil baron in his time and
flew in from his home in Australia. The man was approaching seventy
but, even now, he still had a coppery sheen to his hair. Jake saw a
lot of where Hazel got her personality from. The man's son-in-law
seemed to live in fear of his wife's father. Of course, Hazel's father
seemed a bit nervous around Jake as well and completely at a loss as
to how to deal with his own daughter. Perhaps the man just lived in
perpetual fear and discomfort.

The wedding went off more or less flawlessly. All that Jake could
remember clearly from his wedding day now was his wife, framed in her
hair and veil, and how looking at her literally made him short of
breath.

                                      -=-

"You're not listening, are you?" asked Hazel.

Jake looked at her across the table and smiled, "Yes I was. You were
talking about how well you and your sister are getting along right
now."

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Listen without listening. You were a million miles away."

Jake opened his mouth to answer. Hazel waved him off, "Never mind.
What were you thinking about?"

"Just getting nostalgic," said Jake.

"Happy memories, I take it?"

"If I told you, you would never believe me."

"Try me," said Hazel.

"I was remembering how you looked in your wedding dress," said Jake.
"You literally took my breath away."

Hazel laughed, "Flatterer." But, she blushed and lowered her head,
accepting the compliment.

Jake looked around the table, "It looks like we're finished. Did you
want to share your big secret?"

"All right," she said, rising. "Will you walk with me?"

Jake took her outstretched hand. When he got close to her, he said
quietly, near her ear, "Hazel, if this is some kind of set up, I will
never forgive you."

Hazel's eyes had the old mischief, "If this were a set up, I wouldn't
blame you. That would be pretty vile of me. Do you really think I
would be capable of something like that?"

"No," said Jake. "But, I can't take any chances where Darwin is
involved. And, I don't know what you would do to keep him."

Hazel laughed, "You do have your imagination, Jake." One thing Jake
had liked about the Summer House was that the restaurant was attached
to a botanical garden under a huge glass terrarium. The garden had
been the vanity project of a Vandevoort some time in the middle of
nineteenth century, but he did not seem to have the modern disease of
putting the name on everything he funded. It was December outside, but
in here, it was summer.

"I never had a gift for subterfuge," Hazel went on. "It would never
have occurred to me to set you up. It might have occurred to Patricia,
though. She threatened to quit as my lawyer if I had this meeting with
you."

"I'm sure Alex wouldn't be happy if he knew I were here," said Jake.

"You know what I keep thinking," said Hazel. "I listen to those two
going at it hammer and tongs in our negotiations and think that
they're about five minutes from tearing each others' clothes off and
going at it on the conference table."

Jake laughed until he had to hold onto a tree for balance.

"God," he said, wiping his eyes. "I got the visual on that. How in the
hell am I supposed to go back in there and not start laughing the
minute they start yelling at each other?"

"I would suggest you not look at my face, then. A couple of times it
looked like I was crying, I was actually laughing thinking about it."
She looked at Jake and smiled. It was an easy smile, but a little bit
sad, "It doesn't matter. There won't be any more negotiations."

Jake stopped walking, pulling his hand away from her, "What do you
mean there won't be any more negotiations?"

"I'm giving up, Jake," she said. "I was offered a job in Brazil and
I'm going to take it."

Jake tensed as if hit in the gut. Then, he said quietly, "I won't let
you take Darwin to Brazil. I'll fight you."

"You would lose," said Hazel. "On paper, I'm an excellent mother. But,
I'm not taking Darwin. This is the opportunity of a lifetime. If I
stayed here and fought out the settlement, I would miss it."

"That must be some job," said Jake.

"It is," said Hazel. "But, that's not it. I was very angry at you when
I left Boston, Jake."

"I figured that," said Jake. "It's rare for a woman to leave her
husband because he's making her too damned happy to stand."

"I still can't believe you picked Thule over me," said Hazel. Then,
she raised her hands, "I know. It's more complicated than that. But,
that's how it feels. Anyway, once I stopped being so angry with you, I
realized I shouldn't have taken Darwin with me. As long as you don't
get yourself killed, you'll be much better at taking care of him than
I would. I was never really cut out to be a mother."

"You've done a good job as a mother," said Jake.

"Thank you," said Hazel. "But, I never warmed to the job. Did you ever
notice how no one ever has children in any of Rand's work? Unless
you're willing to see the child as an extension of yourself,
parenthood and Objectivism just don't mix. Besides, I never liked
children. I kept hearing that it would be different when they were my
own. It is. But, it's not different enough. Darwin will have a much
better chance of growing up right if his mother isn't there every day
resenting the amount of her own freedom she had to sacrifice to raise
him."

Jake walked with her, "You're willing to put this down on paper?"

Hazel nodded, "I already have. I have the paperwork in my purse." She
opened her purse, drew out an envelope, and offered it to him. Inside
were two sheets of paper covered in printed black text.

Jake read it over, "What does this mean? 'Division of real and
fiduciary marital assets will be at the discretion of the party of the
second part.'"

"It means you give me what you think it fair," said Hazel. "You'll
want your lawyer to confirm that for you. But, that's what it says.
I'm relying on your overdeveloped sense of fairness to find an
equitable division of what we built up together. I'm of the conceit
that you won't be able to keep hating me forever."

"I don't hate you now," said Jake.

"You might if you knew everything," said Hazel. "There are things I
haven't told you."

"I knew about the affair," said Jake. "Was there anything else you
needed to get off your chest?"

Hazel stopped and stared at him, the color running out of her face,
"How..."

Jake put an arm around her and kissed her on the forehead, "I read
tells for a living. And, like you said, you have no gift for
subterfuge."

"You never mentioned it."

Jake shrugged, "By the time it happened, I didn't entirely blame you.
It was a very unhappy period for us."

                                      -=-

Hazel came home near ten o'clock that night. Jake had forgotten what
her official excuse was. But, she must think he was really unobservant
if he believed he didn't notice that she went from having no interest
in community events to suddenly taking an interest in PTA meetings,
political organizations, and weekend bake sales.

The cheating bothered him a little, the lying a little more. But,
mostly he appreciated the time alone with his son and, when Sean was
asleep, the quiet. They were fighting three or four times a week by
then. Some weeks, the evenings of her dalliances were the only peace
he got.

Jake looked up from his book when Hazel crossed the living room,
"Hello, dear. Did you have a good evening?"

"Not really," said Hazel. "I can only take so much of suburban
housewives babbling about their half-witted concerns before I want to
scream."

"Did you eat?"

Hazel nodded and pretended to yawn, "I had dinner with Cathy. Right
now, I just want to get some sleep."

"All right," said Jake. He offered his cheek and she kissed it, "Good
night, Hazel."

After she left the room, he shook his head and scowled. Then, he went
back to his book.

                                      -=-

Their marriage started out well enough. They honeymooned in Venice, a
gift from her grandfather. Where they would go had been a subject of
long debate. Hazel had been reluctant to believe she would enjoy
Europe at all, but she fell in love with the old city.

Venice was where Jake perfected the glare. On her own, Hazel was
constantly at risk of being groped or pinched by amorous Italian men.
Even with Jake by her side, some of the more adventurous ones still
tried their luck with her. So, Jake perfected the glare. Hazel seemed
very entertained by the whole affair once she had her protector at her
side.

"Do the glare for me," she said to Jake back at their room.

"I don't do the glare," Jake protested. "It just happens."

"All right. Pretend some Italian boy just copped a feel on me." Once
Jake made a face, she said, "God. You are scary."

Jake put an arm around her waist, "How scary?"

"Scary enough that I would probably let you feel me up and not put up
too much of a fuss."

Jake unzipped her dress, "And if I did this?"

Hazel placed her fists on his chest, "Then I would call you a savage."

He drew the dress down from her shoulders and kissed her throat, "And
this?"

"Monster," she said, smiling as he lowered her to the bed.

                                      -=-

It was just before finals of their senior year when Hazel joined Jake
on the couch.

"I just took a test," she told him. "It says I'm pregnant again."

Jake lowered his book and looked at her, "How?"

Hazel laughed, "The usual way, I suspect."

Jake scowled, "Do those pills do anything at all?"

"Apparently, I'm too just too fertile for my own good."

"Well," said Jake. "It's sooner than we meant to."

Hazel nodded, "I know we wanted to wait a year after graduation to
even seriously discuss it."

"You seem awfully chipper about it," said Jake.

"Actually," said Hazel. "I'm completely freaked out. But, that doesn't
do any good. Does it?"

"At least it gives us time to prepare," said Jake. "We'll have
graduated and I should have a job by then."

"I might have one too," said Hazel.

Jake looked at her, "No. You won't. You know what the doctor said
about the possibility of another miscarriage."

"Doctors don't know anything," she said. "Besides, we're going to need
money even more if there's a baby on the way."

"Let me worry about money," Jake said. "I'll provide for us."

                                      -=-

By the time they graduated, Jake still had no job. They relocated
temporarily to Atlantic City. Darwin was born. Hazel finished her
novel. Jake became a victim of his own success. For three years, he
made more money playing poker than he could have as a junior
architect. But, the pressure was getting to him. Three times it seemed
like they were going to be able to move to the next level financially.
And three times he suffered a bad streak.

His father had supported his family for twenty years as a grinder.
But, Jake remembered a number of times when things had gotten pretty
bad because of setbacks in the game. Hazel didn't understand his
objections. She also had some funny ideas about what sort of job he
should take as an architect.

It was shortly after his son's third birthday that Jake found a way
out of his dilemma.

"I got a job offer today," he told Hazel. "It's a good one, I think."

He'd read on a web site that covered the architecture business that
Vandevoort Enterprises had acquired an architectural firm. Jake's
father had worked with Ivan Vandevoort's father. Based on that
connection, Jake had contacted Ivan directly and, after a brief
interview, been offered a job. Initially, there would be a lot of
less-than-glamorous work, but Ivan promised that there were big
projects in the future. And, the money was better than anything he'd
been offered in the last three years.

Hazel had been reluctant even then. But, Jake mentioned that he didn't
want Darwin starting school in Atlantic City. That she understood.
Half a block from the casinos, the whole town was a shithole. So, Jake
moved back to Mannsborough with his wife and son.

The job was not what Jake expected. He did three site inspections,
managing to save Ivan from getting involved in a multimillion dollar
deal that ruined the three primaries because they hadn't done their
research.

Then, for three weeks, there was no work. He showed up at his office
at nine, did some research for a book he was considering writing, and
left at five. After three weeks, Ivan Vandevoort himself showed up a
the office.

"So, Jake. How are you liking it here?"

"Well," admitted Jake. "Things are a little bit slow right now. But,
I'm getting settled in nicely."

"Great," said Ivan. "Listen, I was wondering if you could do me a
favor. I'm flying to Amsterdam this week and was hoping you could keep
an eye on my wife."

"I'm sorry," said Jake.

Ivan frowned, "My wife Svetlana. I'm afraid that she's gotten a bit of
a bee in her bonnet over something. I know how she gets. She needs
adult supervision."

"But, I'm an architect," said Jake.

"I know," said Ivan reasonably. "But, it's not exactly like anyone in
my organization has the title, 'Svetlana Handler.' Besides, there's
not a lot of architectural work right now. And, I was hoping to keep
you on the payroll until I could start work on my new villa."

Jake understood the carrot and the stick. Still, it was an awfully
tasty carrot Ivan dangled. And, Jake wasn't ready to give up and go
back to Atlantic City. So, he took the job of keeping an eye on
Svetlana.

Svetlana tried to seduce him, but Jake didn't take it personally. She
seemed to be trying to seduce anyone that she could embarrass her
husband with.

"You do know that your husband expects me to report back everything
you do while he's gone," he told Svetlana the first day he was up at
the house.

"Of course," she said. "If you miss anything, let me know and I'll
give you a full transcript."

Once Jake had established that he wasn't going to sleep with Svetlana
under any circumstances, they actually developed a friendship of
sorts. At the time, Ivan was letting her go out supervised. Most of
the time, Jake could pretend to himself that he was her de facto
bodyguard. 

                                      -=-

"So," asked Hazel. "What's this I hear about you escorting another
woman around town?"

"That's Mrs. Vandevoort," said Jake. "Ivan asked me to escort her a
few places when he's not around."

Hazel nodded sagely, "I don't have anything to worry about. Do I?"

Jake shook his head, "Not at all."

Hazel eyed him as if trying to suss out a deeper truth. It gave Jake
time to look her over as well. Hazel had started to wilt a little
since they'd come to Mannsborough. She was home during the day with
Darwin. She'd sent her novel off to numerous publishers and been
universally rejected. Worse, Jake had read it and knew it was awful.
Hazel desperately wanted to be the second coming of Ayn Rand.
Unfortunately, the novel she'd produced read like a cross between a
position paper and a simplistic morality play. Her characters were
caricatures. Jake didn't have the heart to tell her. She'd worked
three years on it.

"Jake," she said. "I've heard bad things about Ivan Vandevoort. You're
not getting into any trouble. Are you?"

"Nah," said Jake. "You know how everybody likes to tear down the
rich."

"All right," said Hazel. "Just be careful."

                                      -=-

"Take this." Vladi handed Jake a shoulder holster with a pistol in it.
Jake looked at Vladi, uncomprehending.

"What for?"

"Just in case there's trouble," said Vladi. Jake wondered what sort of
trouble he and Vladi could run into that the two of them would need
guns for. As big as Jake was, Vladi dwarfed him.

"Where are we going?" Jake asked.

"Motel out on Route Seventeen," Vladi said. "Vil says there's a guy
there who's been engaging in industrial espionage. We need to go put
the fear of God in him."

As they got in the car, Jake asked, "Couldn't you do this better in
your police uniform."

Vladi gave him a mirthless grin, "Definitely not."

They broke down the door of the man's motel room. Jake watched as
Vladi smashed a camera and a laptop. Then, Vladi told him to "go
outside and keep watch." Jake did. Standing outside the door, he could
barely hear the voices of the two men inside, one threatening, the
other pleading. But, he could clearly hear the slap of flesh on flesh.

                                      -=-

That night, he unburdened his soul to Hazel. Her solution was simple.
Jake had to quit. He was going to get himself killed.

He was afraid to quit. As he turned the idea over in his head, he
found himself implicated in Ivan's work more deeply, a little bit at a
time, until he was in way too deep to quit. Hazel became more
insistent that he quit. Jake promised that he would. But, as the
months marched on, he still hadn't found the right time. Hazel was
getting more shrill by the day. Jake couldn't blame her. He was
horrified by what he saw on the job. He didn't participate. But, he
knew that if he stayed long enough, he would be given the choice.

Worst were the envelopes of money Ivan had him deliver, mostly to
young women and their families. No one told him what the money was
for. He made it clear that he didn't want to know. But, he had eyes.
As sickening as the realization was, it was made worse by watching
people's faces light up when they saw the cash he brought. Even some
of the girls lit up like they had won the lottery or something.

Jake decided to quit, no matter what the risk. He would take one of
Ivan's envelopes, get on a plane with Hazel and Darwin, and go
somewhere that he could keep them safe. He would tell the FBI
everything that he knew about Ivan's operation.

It was while he was waiting for a sufficiently large envelope to come
into his hands that Jake met Thule. The envelope he'd been given for
Thule was big enough that he could have run with it, but the timing
was wrong. If they ran, they wouldn't be gone more than an hour before
Ivan realized it.

He'd known that Thule was up to some sort of game the first time they
met. But, he'd assumed it was the game he claimed to be playing. It
wasn't until later that Jake realized Thule could be his ticket out of
Ivan's grasp.

Shortly after meeting Thule, he'd met Matika. He hadn't known she was
a FBI agent, of course. Ivan had given Jake the responsibility of
hiring the ringers for his son Randy's coronation party. His
instructions were specific. He had to find women who were beautiful,
not from the area, not recognizable pros, and willing to get wild on
cue.

He'd gone to New York nightclubs, seeking women who matched the
description. He had long since given up telling Hazel the details of
what he did for Ivan and Hazel had stopped asking. He wondered how
much she knew. It was following one of these excursions that he'd
first realized she was having an affair. He felt like he had no moral
high ground from which to condemn her for it.

He'd seen Matika at three different clubs before she approached him.
Jake had never approached her because she just seemed too "on" like
her wildness was forced or an act. She caught him outside the
Limelight one night.

"Hey, I heard you were paying girls to go to a Vandevoort party," said
Matika. "Is that true?"

Jake nodded, "Yeah. Something like that."

"That Randy Vandevoort is a hunk. I would come for free."

"That's nice," said Jake. "But, I'm looking for a very specific type
of girl for the party. And, you're not her."

Looking around, Matika placed a hand on Jake's chest and flowed in
closer to him, "Are you sure? I really want to go to that party."

Jake saw the offer in her eyes and wanted to get away. So, he said,
"Fine" and gave her the information.

                                      -=-

"Jake, get the fuck in here!"

Jake stepped into Ivan's office, "What's up, boss?"

"That son of a bitch Thule took my whore of a wife off the estate
grounds."

Jake nodded calmly, even though his heart and mind were going a mile a
minute, "What do you want me to do, boss?"

"I want you to go down there tomorrow morning and blow the
motherfucker's head off."

Jake didn't say anything. But, he could feel his gorge rising.

By morning, the order was rescinded. Ivan had a new story. He was glad
to be rid of his whore of a wife. And, he needed Thule as his in at
Tarr Industries. Still, a line had been crossed. Jake was getting out
of there one way or another. He would gather what evidence he could
and go to the FBI.

When he realized Thule had the same plans on a much grander scale, it
was with a great sense of relief. Unfortunately, he'd talked to Hazel
just enough about Thule that she saw him as just another thug for a
rival of Ivan's. And, she never got that idea out of her head. Jake
had hoped that, when Thule offered him the job of writing his
autobiography, Hazel would come to understand him better. But, she
never read it. Jake's success as a writer was just another bitter pill
to her after the spectacular failure of her own novel. Besides, they
were fighting regularly then, making misunderstandings a common
occurence.

Things should have gotten better once they got to Boston. But, they
were already too far gone. Jake hadn't been sure Hazel would be
willing to move to Boston for his job. She was doing some freelance
editing for a pair of economic journals, which she could do from
anywhere. Jake was hoping that a change of scenery might help.
Instead, it isolated Hazel and forced her to focus all of her
attention on Jake and Darwin.

When the attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon happened, Jake
had just begged Hazel to give the new job a year before she passed
judgment on it. She took it to be a promise that he would quit after a
year. In the wake of the attacks, RSS grew at terrifying speed. The
CEO Thule hired had been predicting such an attack for almost two
years. He'd quit his job as security head at a Miami airport over
administrative unwillingness to implement what he called "even the
rudiments of security" right before he took the job at RSS. Thule's
name was in the headlines regularly in regards to the Vandevoort
trials. The firm kept outgrowing their offices.

The original firm had been founded to provide software and consulting
services to the security industry. Within short order, RSS had bought
a firm that provided physical security and another that handled
private investigations. Jake didn't know how Thule kept up with it
all. The younger man seemed to have an almost superhuman endurance.
More than once, Jake came in to the office in the morning to find
Thule asleep on a couch in his office and, on one memorable occasion,
sound asleep sitting upright at his desk.

It was the hardest Jake had ever worked and he threw himself into it.
Part of it was his lack of desire to go home. By the time he fought
his way through Boston rush hour traffic, Darwin would be in bed
anyway. He and Hazel weren't even fighting anymore so much as snapping
at each other whenever they came into contact. They tried to avoid
each other as much as possible. But, the apartment was too small for
them to be more than one room away from one another. Jake found
himself wishing she would find a lover in Boston and give him some
peace and quiet.

He knew his marriage was nearing the end. There was no romance to
rekindle, no communication to improve. It was just a matter of time
before the last straw made an appearance.

"I've got a symposium in Chicago this weekend," Hazel said. "If you're
going to be working this weekend, you'll need to find a sitter."

Jake nodded, "We've got a planning meeting for the 2002 budget on
Sunday that I should be at."

"All right," said Hazel. "Have you told them that you're only staying
for a year yet?"

Jake let his irritation show on his face, "Why would I tell them
that?"

Hazel stood up, "Jake, you promised me this would only be for a year."

"I never said that."

It was their first real fight in a while and kept rising in volume. As
much as possible, they'd tried not to fight when Darwin was within
earshot. Neither one of them seemed able to hold back now. As their
volume rose, the inevitable happened. Darwin woke up and started
crying.

Jake stopped himself in mid-bellow, composed himself as much as
possible, and said, "I have to get to work. We'll talk about this when
I get back."

When he got back, Hazel and Darwin were gone.

                                      -=-

The Summer House was nearly deserted as Jake and Hazel strolled
through. A caretaker was doing some weeding and an elderly couple
sharing a bench, but the gardens seemed otherwise empty. Still, they
had found a secluded grotto where they could feel completely alone.

"We've had some really awful times together, haven't we?" Hazel asked.

Jake nodded, "I like to think we had more good times."

Hazel turned to face him, "A lot more good times. There's no way to
get them back, is there?"

Jake sighed, "We could try. Maybe some time apart would give us a
fresh start."

Hazel stepped in so that she was leaning on Jake's chest. Going up on
the tips of her toes, she kissed him on the mouth. Even after the kiss
ended, she kept her hand on the back of his neck.

"You're a good man, Jake Steiner. Even when you were a thug, I knew
that."

Jake felt a lump developing in his throat, "You're not making it any
easier to let go of you, Hazel."

Hazel put her other arm around his waist, "I don't want it to be easy,
Jake. I'm going to have a hard time getting over you. If you got over
me too quickly, it would destroy me."

Jake hugged her back, "There's no chance of that, Hazel. You're one in
a million. You could try to make it a little bit easier, though."

"How?"

"I don't know," said Jake. "Call me names again. Something."

Hazel shifted in his arms so that her lips were right next to his ear.
Then, she whispered, "Savage."

Jake's eyes widened, "Hazel?"

She pulled herself out of his arms, made eye contact, and said,
"Monster."

Jake looked down at his wife, "Hazel, I...."

Turning her back on Jake and staring at some fixed point in the
distance, Hazel said, "This shelf is crooked. Take it down and put it
up straight."

Jake was stunned. He could think of a million reasons why he shouldn't
take her up on her offer. But, one fact burned through them all like a
lighthouse through the fog. This was the woman he'd loved for a long
time. It had been a long time since he'd been with her and it was
unlikely that he was ever going to get another chance.

Wrapping his arms under hers, he pushed her forward until she was
pressed against a tree trunk. She gasped and said, "Thug."

She'd dressed in a thin sundress, appropriate for the summer-like
temperatures in the terrarium. When Jake lifted up her skirts, he
discovered she wasn't wearing anything underneath.

"You were planning this," he said indignantly.

"Let's just say I was prepared for it," said Hazel. Jake couldn't see
her eyes, but he knew what mischief they must hold. Somehow, the idea
that this wasn't entirely spontaneous, that his soon-to-be-ex-wife had
intended to seduce him all along aroused him even further. His hand
closed between her legs, stroking and invading her.

"God, Jake," Hazel gasped. "You are a brute, aren't you?"

Jake nodded, his other hand roaming freely over her body. He kissed
and nipped at her neck.

He took her quickly. The risk of getting caught was part of the
thrill, but not so much that he was willing to prolong their exposure.
As he entered her, he clamped a hand on Hazel's mouth. She bit him,
but he held firm, driving into her, making one last claim on his wife.

It was over too soon, but Hazel was trembling in Jake's arms as he
came. Even after his climax, he stayed inside of her as long as he
could, not wanting to break the connection. Eventually, Hazel turned
in his arms, wrapping her own around his neck and kissing him on the
mouth. The kiss lingering and, when it broke, Jake's lips were
tingling as if they had an electrical current running through them.

"Oh, yeah," said Jake, smiling at her. "That'll make it much easier to
let go."

"So," asked Hazel, pulling away and straightening her skirts, "are you
convinced now that I'm not wearing a wire?"

Jake's laughter rumbled forth, "Or much of anything else. Weren't you
cold in that outfit coming up here?"

Hazel nodded, "Freezing. Even in my coat, I had to run to the car and
turn the heat all the way up."

"You didn't run up the path from the parking lot," said Jake.

"I wanted to," said Hazel. "But, I thought you might be watching."

                                      -=-

They left the restaurant arm-in-arm, the very picture of the happy
couple.

"I would like to see him once in a while if I could," said Hazel.

Jake nodded, "I'm sure that can be arranged."

They stopped at the door of his rental car and kissed once again.
Then, Hazel said, "I really have to go."

Jake nodded, "I'll miss you, Hazel."

"I'll miss you too, Jake. Take care of yourself. And, take care of
Darwin."

Jake kissed the top of her head and got in his car. He watched Hazel
trot away to hers. Even after she drove away, he sat for a long time
looking at the place where she'd been.