OFFERING I do not scream when they bind my wrists Although the cord cuts me The men step back and I see the villagers My mother covering her face My father's leather apron scorched from his forge My brothers, angry My sisters, weeping Zachary stands among them He will not look at me As they strip off my clothes He keeps his eyes downcast I want to accuse him, to blame him Why did he not press me more? Why did he let me refuse him? One of the men grins at me An unpleasant leer, too familiar He by the lord's order was my guard After the lottery, in the dungeon Desperate, I pleaded with him To free me, or failing that, to take me Ravished, I would be no use to them The bars cold iron against my body My hands outreached, begging Speaking words I'd never said Crudity to make my soul blanch Said nonetheless, groveling Revealing myself to him Until he came into my cell Unhandsome, unshaven, unwashed, Yet I embraced him as though He were the most noble of princes Rough hands upon me Pushing me to my knees The smell of stale beer on his breath His laugh the shrill chuckle of a rat He says he needs to be made ready Shuddering, I do as he wishes Hot pungent flesh filling my mouth Loathing myself yet eager Grateful to this horrid man His hands in my hair, painful Choking me, grunting his pleasure He does not withdraw I cannot pull back, I cannot breathe He holds my head, thrusting faster Until my mouth is flooded I empty myself onto the floor Sobbing, spitting to rid myself Of the wretched taste of him Looking down on me he laughs Calls me a fool for thinking that he Would risk his life for a tumble Or disobey the lord's command He leaves me alone in the dark I claw at the walls but find nothing No freedom, no light, no hope Now I stand naked against the post Arms high, wrists bound Before the eyes of my family My neighbors, my friends Zachary still looks away Does he remember, as I do, The dances and fairs? Does he remember, as I do, The moonlight walks, the kisses The talk of marriage? Nell stands beside him No virgin, she Her smile is cold, her hand possessive Upon his arm. They strike the drums and sound the horn And now I scream, it is all true No blessed awakening from this nightmare No sudden discovery of error No knight bold and brave to rescue me Only my brothers moving forward Stopped at sword's point by the lord's men My screams counterpoint the drums and horns Calling you, heretofore unseen Except as a shape against the moon Or a gout of flame in the sky Your signature left in the fields In the charred, ravaged, half-eaten Remains of our herds The call sounded, they fall back Hiding and leaving me to my fate My wrists bleed from my struggles The post abrading my skin I recall a rabbit I saw once in a snare Chewing off its own foot for freedom I would do the same but my bonds are too high Your winged shadow falls over me My fear departs, again like a rabbit Who, seeing the growing shadow of the hawk Knows only relief that at last it is over I hope that you will be swift Will it be the fire? Or will I feel your talons rend my flesh? Your breath is hot though not burning Your scent is leather and cinnamon I raise my head and see your eyes Golden as your hoard must be Your scales as maroon as the blood I expect to soon feel flowing You regard me as a cat does a mouse In legend your kind is immense You must be young for a horse is larger Despite your youth you are fierce Sleek and deadly, of lethal beauty I am struck by awe and dread And anger! I want to cry out Why? Why must you do this? You would not answer if I spoke You sniff me, curious, as if you do not know What strange beast this is, that cannot flee I cringe away from you to no avail Your scales softer than kidskin As you nuzzle my wounds Smelling the virgin blood offered to you Your tongue flicks out Long and black, tasting Sliding over my breasts The forked ends teasing both nipples Before diving over my belly Lower still to my thighs And the place between them I am horrified at sudden desire Stronger than that shared with Zachary In hurried gropings behind the barn Your tongue moves onward I have no screams left to scream And can only stare as my injuries Heal beneath your inhuman kiss With ivory fangs you bite Severing the cords that hold me Not touching my skin Such delicacy is unexpected I do not run, though I would not get far You raise a taloned paw and bat at me Again like a cat, playful Playful but strong and purposeful Knocking me to hands and knees Before I can rise I feel your warmth Moving over me and into me Parting me painfully And now I find a scream To my shame it is of passion Your wings enfold me like velvet Your teeth nip lightly at the nape of my neck I buck to meet your smooth thrusts Like a mare to a stallion I can hear your low growls Echoed by my own cries As I hopelessly yeild myself to you Your forepaws lock around my waist And still filling me, you leap skyward The ground falls away beneath us And I think to myself through my daze of desire How glad I am to have stayed pure How fortunate to have been selected As offering to you, my love