Archive-name: Miscell/erosia07.txt Archive-author: David P. Thomas Archive-title: Erosian Theory and Practice Erosian Theory Developed My theory came into being from a multitude of experiences and also from inner feelings which differed tremendously from standard practice ideas concerning sex. I'll take this time to break down a few of these myths concerning sex in general, and in relation to how Erosian Theory deals with the same situation. I. Sex is for people in love, primarily married people. Men get away with sex because it is condoned for them but women shouldn't or they'll be cheap. Sex is for every one old enough to deal with and handle the responsibility of sex. Sex is for married and unmarried people. Sex is for women as well as men. Sex is for everyone. It is GOOD, RIGHT, NORMAL, HEALTHY, for everyone, at anytime or place when consenting adults are involved. I think the keyword here is consenting adults. As long as both (or more ) parties are in agreement as to the nature of their act, there is nothing morally, legally or ethically wrong with any sexual act. II. Sex should be between one man and one woman only. Once again, the keyword here is consenting adults. Personal tastes, and the backward thinking of certain cultures have forced us into the molds that we live in today. Between two consenting women, or two consenting men, any relationship desired is correct. It is their own PERSONAL TASTES which defines their sexuality, and not that of a televangelist or county commissioner. As long as both parties enjoy and consent to an act, and it doesn't infringe upon another's rights, who is to criticize. Also who is to say that the act of sex should be limited to two people. Many times there are parties of three, four, five or more consenting adults who desire to share each others sexuality. Where is the harm in this, if the above guidelines are applied? III. The act of sex should consist of vaginal/penile intercourse, with foreplay consisting of hand to genital or in some circles mouth to genital contact. Anything other than this is really unusual or sick. I have to admit that even the above statement has come a long way from 50 years ago, when a man never SAW his wife undressed, but it still leaves out a huge section of the population. There are many people who would bore quickly of the above scenario, and therefore have other interests sexually. These can include fetishism, role reversals, group experiences, ect, or what some people refer to as kinky or perverted. But ask someone who genuinely enjoys one of these diversions if he or she is a pervert, and they'll look at you like you are one yourself. PERVERTS are criminals who prey on children and helpless, nonconsenting adults with a sexuality of force. Kinky is a cute word, and personally I don't have anything against it, however, I have begun using the term Alternate Lifestyles to describe these differences in sexual enjoyment. See the chapter on Code of Practice for more details on alternate lifestyles. IV. Pornography is sick, perverted, filthy and degrades women. It makes society lose its moral values. It abuses women and children. FIRST - Let me state clearly that Erosian Theory does NOT support child pornography, child sex, pedophilia, or child abuse in any way. SECONDLY - Erosian Theory in NO WAY supports abuse of any one, women, children or otherwise. It is against every code and practice of the Erosian Theory to participate in any activity with a child or any person not totally in agreement with the activity performed. This said, and kiddie porn aside, let me discuss regular adult pornography. For the most part, pornography features men and women as consenting sexual partners. Pornography feature a variety of topics, catering to multiple interests. The majority of mainstream, accepted adult material no matter how graphic or explicit is done in total agreement with all person involved. Many people actually try to work their way into the porn business. However a small segment of society would like you to believe that these women are being kidnaped, drugged and forced at gunpoint to perform. As sure as I am that this has occurred, I am equally as sure that this is the smallest percentage imaginable, and this type of material would only appeal to the truly problematic. Once again, CONSENT is the key. In Erosian Theory, the majority of pornography is wholesome, enjoyable and gives a warm aroused feeling to the reader. The joy of sex is shared, and the ability to collect or enjoy the beauty of male and female figures performing or displaying their sexuality is wonderful. Pornography only becomes dirty when the mind makes it so, and Erosians who endeavor to read, view and collect adult erotic material should do so with a good wholesome feeling. I encourage Erosians to share and trade favorite literature, and use it to enhance your own sexual life, be it thru masturbation or mutually shared ideas. However, see the Codes for unacceptable literature. V. Masturbation is wrong, or if it's not wrong it signifies that you can't get anything else! Masturbation is not wrong. It doesn't signify anything other than you feel aroused, you want to experience that arousal further, and either you choose yourself or you simply DON'T have anyone to share that feeling with. Now, breaking that down, we come across several different topics. Firstly, there are times even within a relationship, when masturbation is preferable to intercourse. Suppose that your current partner is not into the same alternate lifestyle activities you are. You still want to experience these activities, but you have a commitment. Masturbation will allow you the freedom (to a degree) to experience your lifestyle. Also, while intercourse is sharing, many times you may not desire to share and wish for the ability to arouse and pleasure yourself at your own pace. Like many things, masturbation is a powerful, enjoyable, clean, GOOD tool. VI. Sex is related to love, and without love, sex become flat,boring and old. First, sex is not related to love. Sex can be an outpouring of love, a desire to please a loved one, an extension of one's love, ect, but in itself, sex is a pleasurable, physical act. Secondly, love can actually stifle the experimental qualities of sex. Love can place limits if the relationship is not open to experimental actions, especially if one party has an interest in learning and experimenting and the other doesn't. I'm not opposing love based relationships, and if they work, wonderful. However, the key here is communications. The ability to get across to your partner your desires and turnons is extremely important. Erosian Theory can be summed up simply: Sex and sexuality are deemed extremely important in the life of an Erosian. The fulfillment of the sexual desire is the successful end goal, and personal growth and mental, physical and emotional well being is of the utmost importance along that path. Call to Fellow Erosians If you feel that you share these qualities and desires, then you may determine to study Erosian Theory. All that is required is that you remove all sexual guilt from your life, which is much easier said than done. Understand that nothing you do or attempt to do sexually is wrong, as long as it is with consenting adults, and doesn't hurt anyone. With the guilt removed from your desires, you will begin the process of learning who you truly are sexually. This can lead to new frontiers of sexual experience, and an open door. Experimental sex can be a terrific way to feel comfortable learning about your personal sexuality, and if you decide to register as an Erosian Theorist, then you will have the ability to contact others who, like yourself, are searching for the likes and dislikes in their sexuality. Sound like a pitch? Well, it's not. I don't want anything, other than to see people accept Erosian Theory as a valid way to come to terms with their sexuality. All that you have to do to register is call The Dojo Bulletin Board System, and request access to the Erosian Registration Questionnaire. Within 24 hours you will be able to complete the questionnaire, and you will be assigned an Erosian Number, along with a Preference Code. After that, you will be able to utilize the Dojo's special Erosian Theorist board to contact and discuss in total privacy the aspects of Erosian Theory that you desire to experience most. Hopefully, and it is my idea of the ideal situation, Erosian Theory will blossom within a select group of the community, and we will be able to meet, discuss, experience and enjoy each other's company, sexuality and friendship knowing that we share the same ideals concerning sex. IMPORTANT NOTE : THIS IS NOT A SWAP CLUB, OR A SWING CLUB! Those people have reached a happiness of their own accord, and have ideal and goals different from Erosian Theory. They ( and rightly so ) attach themselves to the pleasure principal and are not always interested in growth. The Erosian sees sexual growth as an ongoing process, and seeks to learn, understand and experience those pleasurable sexual experiences which he/she has determined to pursue. I expect many hard core Erosians may never meet another Erosian. It is not required, and Erosian Theory is a way of life, not a sport or event based club. If you have a desire to find others like yourself, then contact the Dojo. A SPECIAL NOTE TO WOMEN : As we are all aware, you do not tend to be as promiscuous as men, based on antiquated theories of looseness and respectability. However, many studies have shown women to be more sexually repressed than men. Erosian Theory allows you to face this repression and experience at least mentally the freedom of sexual expression.Before you turn away from Erosian Theory based on the sexuality involved, answer several questions: 1> Have you ever felt unsatisfied in a sexual relationship? 2> Have you ever had thoughts which titillated you, but you turned them off because they were nasty? 3> Do you masturbate? Can you orgasm with a partner, or by yourself or both ? If you answered yes to any of the above, you may want to look into Erosian Theory before discarding it. There are many levels and branches of Erosian Theory, and if one level, and one good sexual experience comes of your study of Erosian Theory, then you have gained something, for nothing, that you wouldn't have had otherwise. --